Delicious Toppings
- Ask Daemon Mailer
- Backpackers
- Bookmobile
- Business Jesus
- Canaduh
- Conversational Gold
- Delicious Toppings
- Disco Island
- Exclusive!
- Featured Brutality
- Genius of the Week
- Go Deeper
- Grande Chef Otto
- Highlighted Brutality
- Hollywood Pap
- Iraq
- Japan
- Latest Brutality
- Ordinary People
- Party Central
- Presidential Daily Brief
- Santa
- Schadenfreude
- Sick Bay
- Special Report
- Stories For Bottoms
- Stories For Tops
- Thinking Man's Rock
Warm Topic Archives: smia oots
Guy’s Nose Ring Looks Like a Booger
By Smia Oots, VANCOUVER – I saw a guy riding a bike with one of them nose rings?
It looked like a booger.
“Booger” means booger in Canadian English.
“It’s not a booger – it’s a piercing,” the guy, Dale Barrings, 16, a loans officer at Scotia Bank, told me.
But it sure looks like a booger.
Anarchy Condos Under Seige in Toronto
By Smia Oots, THE HOLY CITY OF TORONTO – Anarchists dressed in eye-numbing colored jumpsuits, bathing trunks and business attire hurled themselves against each other and their own underground condo, Toronto’s fashionable Queen’s Quay residence, The Anarchy Condos At No Fixed Address
Posted in Canaduh
Tagged anarchy condos, Canaduh, G-20, green day, smia oots, sports punk, the brutal times, toronto anarchists, vuvuzela
2 Comments
Clones Ruffle Identical Twins’ Feathers
By Smia Oots, HOLLYWOOD – As more and more clones move into the neighborhood and take jobs belonging to identical twins a growing echo of whining is spirally out of control in online chat rooms and some of the worst-kept public rest rooms in the city.
“I don’t like clones, ok?” ejaculated Uger Goolens, 16, a hedge fund manager at Goldman Sachs. His identical twin, Lawrence Goolens, 56, nodded in agreement. “They ruffle my feathers,” Uger went on.
Posted in Hollywood Pap
Tagged billy, clones, coldplay, goldman sachs, hollywood, identical twins, radiohead, ruffle feathers, smia oots, subway vigilantes, the brutal times, toyota, university of tokyo
2 Comments
Irony Apparel a Smash Hit in Williamsburg
By Smia Oots, Brooklyn, WILLIAMSBURG – Four-eyed sneering running-shoe-wearing tattoo-show-offing white-skin-cladding Williamsburg hipsters have bitten onto to something and they just can’t let go!
Irony apparel is a smash hit in Williamsburg.
Apple & Rubix Unveil iPube
By Smia Oots, BRISBANE – Choosing balmy Brisbane as the setting to showcase their first joint venture, former arch rivals Apple Computer and Rubix blew everyone’s jets when they unveiled what industry insiders are saying is revving up to be the hit of the summer.
What is it?
Meet – the iPube.
Posted in Special Report
Tagged apple, brisbane, gadgets, gizmos, ipod, iPube, pubes, rubix cube, smia oots, the brutal times
1 Comment