Warm Topic Archives: Ban Ki-moon

Copycat Quakes Condemned

By Smia Oots, NEW YORK CITY – Prestigious U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki Moon has condemned, and is condemning, any country’s attempt to copy or illegally distribute Japan’s massive March 9.0 magnitude earthquake.

Posted in Japan | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Boring

By Smia Oots, TOKYO – Obama.

Arcade Fire.

Twitter.

Your iPhone.

Posted in Exclusive! | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

North Korea Launches Naughty Rocket

By Barry Hussein, PYONGYANG – North Korea got almost no attention from anyone under 5o today when it behaved “very naughtily” and launched an enormous throbbing Taepodong missile rocket thingy into outer space.

“I don’t care about the rocket – it’s boring,” said Koari Mitsui, 21, a juniour college student at Tokyo’s prestigious International School of Beans & Nail Arts.

Americans didn’t know where North Korea was.

Posted in Presidential Daily Brief | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

The Dark Side of Ban Ki-moon: Operation Pussyfoot

By Barry Hussein, NEW YORK CITY – Despite leading a busy life like everybody else and having problems of his own spry UN Secretary-General is not about to let New Years Eve get in the way of giving Israel a […]

Posted in Featured Brutality | Tagged , , , , , , | 1 Comment