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Oops: New Stooges Album Has Same Title as Biggie Smalls Debut

Ready To Die

The new Iggy & The Stooges album has the same title as The Notorious Big’s masterpiece debut.

Aging Hypocrites Want a Piece of the Pie

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By Daemon Mailer, VERMONT – Angry young people massed themselves into howling packs and began pogoing up and down in riotous response in reaction to the release of a landmark tweet tweeted this morning by prestigious Caribbean think tank MyGoodies.

The tweet, which was promptly deleted before it could incite further unrest, apparently asserted old people are jonesing for more than their share of the proverbial planetary pie.

I Got Probs

I got Probs

By Hessy Marin, Special to The Brutal Times, BOSTON- I got probs. Man, let me tell you! Things were goin’ pretty swell for a while there – new boy, new apartment – even a new car…

Then, I won the lottery.

Is Ben Afleck U.S. Cinema’s Enfant Terrible?

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By Smia Oots, Los Angeles, HOLLYWOOD

Man’s Shit “Doesn’t Stink”

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By El Toro, WOODS HOLE – The medical community has become unhinged this morning with reports of Ron Jean Beaujong, a 22-year-old systems programmer from Oregon clogging up the blogosphere so much so that wi-fi is down all over town.

Know why?

Mr. Jean Beaujong’s shit doesn’t stink.

David Lee Roth Looks Like Steve Martin

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By DJ Salinger, LOS ANGELES – Van Halen fans watching the band’s just-released video with singer David Lee Roth for the song Tattoo, have been scratching themselves more than usual this week, as many were noticing that Roth now bears a striking resemblance to comedian Steve Martin.

“Well, the reason for that is quite obvious to me at least,” quipped Republican U.S. presidential candidate Ron Paul,76.

Oh, and why is that?

“That’s because he is Steve Martin.”

Football Fans Call For More ESPN Gaffes

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By Styles Cradgerock, ATLANTA – Football. More than just passing a ball around. But is it, really? Nonetheless a whole lotta people love this great American pastime.com. Yet more and more, more of them (the lovers) are calling for football [...]

Nameless Drifters Face Housing Shortage

By The Serge, TORONTO – Once again, flying in the face of everything, the upper crust is deeming to dump on, er, the lower crust. Case in point, according to a landmark study issued by prestigious Carribean think tank MyGoodies, [...]

Why Try Harder?: 2012 Republican Presidential Master Debate 8 Spoilers

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By Styles Cradgerock,Florida, ORLANDO- Who’d want to go and sit through another Republican 2012 Presidential Master Debate? But with The Serge off sick and Barry Husein confined to his room I drew the short straw and jetted off from Tokyo to sunny Orlando, Florida to sleep through most of it, the 7th Republican Master Debate in as many weeks.

Boring

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By Smia Oots, TOKYO – Obama.

Arcade Fire.

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