Delicious Topping

Disco Island

Disco Island…what the hell is Disco Island?!? At the time it sounded funny, I guess.

Most Parties Bad, Study Shows

badparty

By The Serge, LOS ANGELES – Prestigious Caribbean think tank MyGoodies released what amounts to a 35-year landmark study on parties, “Parties: a Study”, today at Denny’s.

The result?

Most parties are bad.

Irony Apparel a Smash Hit in Williamsburg

bushshirt

By Smia Oots, Brooklyn, WILLIAMSBURG – Four-eyed sneering running-shoe-wearing tattoo-show-offing white-skin-cladding Williamsburg hipsters have bitten onto to something and they just can’t let go!

Irony apparel is a smash hit in Williamsburg.

Libraries are Killing the Internet

books

By Daemon Mailer, SAN FRANCISCO – San Francisco, home of the Whopper, pizza, the iPod Touch and the Internet. Its citizens are full of themselves.

Ask them for directions and receive the snub of a lifetime.

“We’re the greatest,” says Pauline Faine, 10, a barista in the trendy Haight-Ashbury stoner district.

But now something else San Francisco invented is killing the Internet: Libraries.

Animals to Get Own Internet by 2010

uk-london-zoo

By Smia Oots, LONDON – As members from the G-20 gathered up their satchels and moved their drinks carefully away from table edges and other popular spill zones British Prime Minister Gordon Brown shock-rocked fans with new that animals will get their own Internet by 2010.

“Animals will get their own Internet by 2010,” he said.