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Warm Topic Archives: styles cradgerock
By Styles Cradegerock, WASHINGTON – U.S. President, the American Barack Obama, sat down with Arizona Governor Jan Brewer recently and noticed alarming signs of dyhydration in her face.
“Evian?” he quipped.
“She needs to stay out of the sun, get a big floppy hat and moisturize, moisturize, moisturize,” he went on.
Obama said he understood the governor’s dehydration problem as he “personally struggled with dehydration myself” as a child.
“I..didn’t..get enough water,” he kept talking.
By Styles Cradgerock, SEOUL – People’ve got a tear in their beer over here as former buddies North and South Korea have ceased speaking, emailing , or chatting online. Oh no. Hot sweaty tensions were ratched up and ramped up […]
By Styles Cradgerock, LOS ANGELES – As 2009 dies the horrible death it deserves all of Hollywood is saluting global media giants CNN and Yahoo for delivering the year’s most cutting-edge in-your-face cute pet stories.
In previous years – 2008, 2007 and so on, cute pet stories tended to be eclipsed by political coverage, current events, business news and so on.
But God said from now on, “Let it be otherwise”.
By Styles Cradgerock, IKEA – This thriving, bustling hustling country of 35 million yey-high design mavens and vixens is known been known worldwide as a hotbed of design ever since its yeh-high founder Kronkite Basta, 34 assembled it out of a box and drew oohs and ahs from those standing about.
With IKEA’s 17th annual Basta design awards lurking ahead next Sunday morning at dawn, a disgruntled unpaid intern has leaked news of this year’s winner for Best Nuclear Warhead Design, 2009.
By Styles Cradgerock, DETROIT – As you know we’re all connected by the globalization. And so the unrest in Iran is threatening our air miles.
Accidental Airlines, one of America’s premier low budget fliers says millions, maybe zillions of miles may not be honored or waved entirely due to the crisis.
By Styles Cradgerock, 177 Dusty Meadow Road, PAKISTAN – Classic War on Terror action figure and actual mass murderer Osama bin Laden is alienating younger followers this morning in his hideout with news that “all 2009 al Qaeda videos will be issued on VHS only”.
By Ghazala Khan (Special to The Brutal Times) TOKYO –
The following interview was conducted by Ghazala Khan of The Pakistani Spectator. It recalls a friendlier, more innocent time when staff members of The Brutal Times could casually gather around the fried chicken dispensor in the BT offices at Shimokitazawa Hills. A time when birds chirped, but not too loudly. Before the layoffs and the name-calling. Two weeks ago.
By Styles Cradgerock, with Minx Cradgerock , PARIS – As hard times are felt all across the globe due to the worsening of the financial crisis everyone is looking for ways to pinch pennies and froog to the new frugal beat of 2009.
By Styles Cradgerock, WASHINGTON – Despite his good looks and boyish smile, despite his taste in music (Springsteen) and way with words (“Yes we can”) it appears that fewer and fewer Americans want to touch his bulging stimulus package.
By Styles Cradgerock, DETROIT – Just in time for Christmas, GM has unveiled its most fabulous machine yet – the sex-drive car! The sleek family auto known as the GM Phero, is 100% powered on the pheronome, which in case […]