Warm Topic Archives: thebrutaltimes

U.S. Presidential Debate Spoilers

September 23, 2008

By El Toro, USA AMERICA – Mr Obama, who is running to be the first black US president, will wear a blue tie. Mr McCain, who is running to be the oldest white US president, will wear a red tie. […]

Posted in Presidential Daily Brief | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

11 Year-old: “Obama plus Biden Spells Bin Laden”

August 30, 2008

As Barrack Obama’s throngs of gyrating bikini-clad supporters are just coming to terms with his formal renunciation of his decision Thursday to select his wife of eighteen years Michelle Obama as vice-presidential running mate, a new shocker is shock-rocking this seaside mountain villa.

Posted in Presidential Daily Brief | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Obama Announces Running Mate: It’s Michelle!!

August 23, 2008

WASHINGTON – We’ve just received word, ahead of the Twitter update the world is waiting for, from a source close to the presidential hopeful that Obama has decided to break with tradition and choose his wife, Michelle Obama, as his official running mate.

Posted in Highlighted Brutality, Presidential Daily Brief | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Kill!Kill!Kill!: Marshall Stack Hits The Dirt in Hogtown

May 22, 2008

By Marshall Stack, TORONTO-

The Canadian spring is now nearing lateness, and all about is green with life. Squirrels are screaming in the trees as raccoons shuffle earthward to defecate.

Posted in Canaduh | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Priceless Van Gogh PowerPoints Recovered

May 19, 2008

By Barry Hussein, PARIS – Priceless PowerPoint flow charts done by art world darling Vincent Van Gogh were found inside the bikini brief underpants of vacationing tourist Gerry Ham, as he attempted to board an Airbus 230 for his native […]

Posted in Featured Brutality | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

2 McDonald’s Cheeseburgers Are Cheaper Than 1 Double Cheeseburger

May 2, 2008

By Grande Chef Otto, TOKYO- As world food prices soar and balloon out of control prestigious Caribbean think tank MyGoodies is reporting that on site inspections conclusively indicate that 2 McDonald’s cheeseburgers are cheaper than one double cheeseburger. “We found […]

Posted in Featured Brutality, Grande Chef Otto | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments