Warm Topic Archives: matsumoto boy

Ratko Mladic Changing His Name to Rick?

By Styles Cradgerock, THE HAGUE – The Hague’s newest catch, accused war criminal and Serbian general Ratko Mladic shocked followers on Twitter when he tweeted today:

“I’m thinking of changing my name…to Rick or…maybe Slobodan.”

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Straight Man To Play Gay Man in Movie

By The Serge, HOLLYWOOD NORTH – Movie fans are famous for complaining that the producers of Hollywood’s biggest films have long since run out of ideas, but as the major studios get ready to battle at the box office this Halloween they may do well to hold onto their tongues and get ready for an explosion of creative juices, the likes the silver screen has never seen before.

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J.R.R. Tolkien Wrote a Book about Onion Rings

By Grande Chef Otto, NEW YORK CITY – Fans of Hogwarts are squirming more than they care to admit as town criers at Denny’s say J.R.R. Tolkien wrote a book about onion rings.

“First of all, it’s not ‘Hogwarts – it’s Middle Earth,” whined Hogwarts fan Heather Bille, 50. “What’s more is the genious who created Middle Earth, J.R.R Tolkien, was also secretly a lover of fast food,” she went on, not blinking.

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Got Allergies? Try Charles Manson’s Cookie Diet

By Grande Chef Otto, LOS ANGELES – A lot of people I know are suffering from allergies these days – hay fever, peanut butter, claustrophobia and arachnophobia being at the top of the list.

But a nifty new diet developed by charismatic California convict Charles Manson is headed straight to your cuisine rescue, courtesy of Japanese impressario Matsumoto Boy and his casually-dressed office tower full of plebes and flunkies.

The product? Charles Manson’s cookie diet.

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