Man Pays Twice For Same Meal

ihopBy Smia Oots (with InfoSandwich News Services) SAN FRANCISCO – Reports are everywhere on the Web this morning speculating that a Bay area man has paid twice for the same meal.

The man who is as yet unidentified bears little or some resemblance to reclusive hip hop singing sensation Eminem.

“He has Eminem’s ears, basically – but probably very few people are going to be able to visualize this outside of those who have some kind of special or vested interested in Eminem’s ears,” said Conner Chang, 11.

Chang was sitting beside me on the bus when he noticed me typing away furiously on this article, and in the process leaving greasy finger marks all over my new iPod Touch.

I at first became suspicious when he offered to help write the article for me as we are of different ages, genders, and er, ethnic backgrounds.

Back to the story though – the man who many are saying paid twice for the same meal has no reported history of mental illness and yet after ordering his scrumptous meal of griddle cakes, ham and toast paid for it in advance and followed this by paying once again at the cash register on his way out.

The owner of the restaurant, Pasta La Vista, a popular California chain ristorante is Colamine Rabisco. Rabisco, 52, was at home searching for fresh porno on YouTube at the time the incident took place, according to his attorney Veal McDougal III.

Yeah, times change, but do they really?

I mean even 20, 30 years ago I bet you could hear about stuff like this happening.

Locals were stunned to hear that the man who paid twice might be one of their own.

“I’ll admit it is possible, although unlikely that someone from this area might have done such a thing (paid twice)” confided Hermina Rhodes, 16. “But I’d prefer to think he’s from some foreign country, or the future.”

Ms Rhodes was not the only San Franciscan wishing to distance herself from our hero.

“Money is so important right now, as a source of feeding oneself and really defining who you are and where you stand,” said 22 year-old philosophy student Laverne Floore. “I really hope that if they catch this guy they make an example outta him.”

FaceBook, the popular Internet pickup site was jammed with opinions echoing Ms Floore’s provocative stance.

“How many people could that guy’s additional $7.96 have fed for a year?” asked Oscar Treets, 24, in a post under the name bigbigdick4you76.

Catherine Bloom 70, broke ranks from the smarter younger crowd and offered some sympathy for the man who paid twice: “When I wake up I’m not sure if I’m awake. It’s entirely possible that I’m that man – please don’t kill me,” she posted, under the name bigbigdick4you1808.

About The Brutal Times

A bit of a toff, really, Admin inhaled the classics early. His ears are ringing and he plans...to answer them.
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One Response to Man Pays Twice For Same Meal

  1. dagmar shook says:

    That article made me want to stop spamming your website with incomprehensible Russian, which may have some obscure link to Viagra.

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