Thom Yorke Addicted To Bananas

LONDON, England (The Brutal Times)- A man named Thom Yorke who locals say sings songs for the punk rock group “Radio Heads” is reported to be addicted to bananas.

Friendly yellow friend, or fiendly yellow fiend?The shocking new news was broken by the band’s long-time best friend and roadie Glen Bennett in a fireside chat with award-winning war correspondent Styles Cradgerock.

Bennett, being interview on the subject of his memoir of life with the band, “My Life With the Band,” was asked by Cradgerock: “Any… hot revelations for us in your book, Glen?”

“Yes, Styles,” Mr. Bennett replied. “Thom Yorke is addicted to bananas.”

Banana addiction affects more than forty million people worldwide, with four million residing in the city of London alone.

Thom Yorke is a Londoner.

Following the bombshell announcement by Mr. Bennett, the Internet Machine became clogged with rumors regarding the origin or Mr. Yorke’s banana mania.

One thirty-something twenty-something Star Wars fan wrote: “Every Radiohead fan knows ‘In Rainbows’ was a slap-on title, and just an attempt to get something out there and onto the shelves in time for Halloween. The real gem in the Radiohead catalog is ‘Bananamania’, the as-yet unreleased hidden album dealing with Thom’s addiction.”

The Brutal Times was unable to contact anyone in the band’s entourage regarding the claims made by Bennett. Styles Cradgerock is on assignment in Baffin Island.

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3 Responses to Thom Yorke Addicted To Bananas

  1. carlos santos says:

    you fuggin guys. you think your cnn.

  2. erin fetterly says:

    this story is absolutely not true. i think the brutal times should think twice about assigning someone of mr. cradgerock`s age – 71, i believe – to cover a band which is really important to young people.

  3. ban ki moon says:

    mr yorke is scheduled to travel to the UN in June. Perhaps at that time I can raise the matter with him.