Warm Topic Archives: democratic peoples’ republic of ikea

Frankenband Spring: Billy Corgan Quits Smashing Pumpkins

April 27, 2011

By DJ Salinger, DEMOCRATIC PEOPLES’ REPUBLIC OF IKEA – Billy Corgan, founding father of Green Day and the Smashing Pumpkins, quit the Smashing Pumpkins yesterday, after fans complained the band’s Ikea performance was “about as exciting as waiting for a bus.”

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Life Metal Gives Hope to Seniors, Pets

October 14, 2009

By DJ Salinger DEMOCRATIC PEOPLES’ REPUBLIC OF IKEA – Despite all the bad-mouthing, and the crushing of neighbors’ fingers in doorjambs at 2am, and the laughing and pointing, despite the cynicism and the ism, a new hope hath arriveded, just in time for Halloween.

Life metal.

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