By Mary-Lou Jasp, Special to the Brutal Times, NEW YORK CITY – Usually when I break up with somebody I’m already seeing someone else. Like when I broke up with Brad I was already seeing his friend Jesse, but I’d been so busy I didn’t get to tell him ’til later.
But last week when I broke up with Caro, my BF for the last 2 months, I totally forgot that I did’nt have a new BF yet! Lucky for me I could go online and chat with my online friends. And I could listen to Nickleback and Coldplay, my fave bands.
But after like four days I started wondering what like Caro was doing.
I went to check his Facebook but he de-friended me.
Talk about an overreaction!
Lucky for me I could call up some of my ex-boyfriends to talk about my prob. Toby shocked me so bad when he said “Maybe you still have feelings for Caro.”
That night I couldn’t sleep! I ate a cake and then I went online for a few hours to chat with friends.
Finally I couldn’t stand it – I called Caro on my iPhone. There was no answer! Then a message came on saying his number was out of service!
Then I remembered Caro told me he was gonna kill himself if I broke up with him. Just like Berry and Robin.
Jimmy…Peter! Hadn’t thought about hime for a while. And Ken!
And…Walter…Jonas…that other Peter guy…Sammy!
And Glenn, James, Jimmy from Spain…Yves!
And Frank, Timmy, Kris- or was it Chris? Long hair…never a good idea.
And…but …oh I gotta go, I think Eric is texting me. I hope he’s feeling better. Just because I cancelled last time, he like didn’t call me for…a while I guess.
I wonder if Caro still likes rollerblading.
Maybe he’s rollerblading in heaven…