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Monthly Archives: January 2008
State Of The Union Spoiler: Iraq War ‘Ironic’ Bush Says
By the serge, WASHINGTON (The Brutal Times) – In advance copies of tonight’s State of the Union address obtained by The Brutal Times, President George W Bush reveals his 2003 plan to invade Iraq was “ironic,” and insists that he […]
I’m So Bad At Cooking!
By Michelle McDougal (Special to The Brutal Times) – This is the third time this week I’ve burnt dinner. I don’t know what is wrong with me! Why can’t I make a good meal, like my cousin Janice? Janice has […]
Posted in Ordinary People
Tagged cooking, dinner, homemakers, insanity, Jamie Oliver, normal, Ordinary People, recipes, reincarnation, spaghetti, the brutal times
2 Comments
Prince Harry Confesses To Ripper Killings
(By Styles Cradgerock) LONDON, England- The twisted tangled trail leading to the unmasking of the true identity of one of England`s most notorious murderers has taken yet another twisted tangled turn . In what has been the first concrete step […]
Where Does The Time Go?
By Ken Falls, (Special to The Brutal Times) – It was just yesterday when I was a young man, throwing the ball around and dreaming about going to college where maybe I could meet some nice girl. Now it’s, wow, […]
Posted in Ordinary People
Tagged aging, college, insanity, Nebraska, normal, Ordinary People, sports, the brutal times
4 Comments
New Radiohead Album ‘Too Soon, Too Soon’ Say Fans
By DJ Salinger, ENGLAND (London) – For those select few lucky enough to be gathered at 19 Breithoss Crossing Place the event held this Sunday evening was one approaching a religious experience. Popular British Deepresso artists Radiohead slipped quietly past the mass media radar, and ingeniously, by holding their secret first listening party one month after the album’s official mainstream release, once again had many music industry veterans feeling baffled and a trifle out of touch.
Posted in Thinking Man's Rock
Tagged brutal times, deepresso, dj salinger, in rainbows, new radiohead, radiohead, the brutal times, Thinking Man's Rock
13 Comments
Canada`s Giraffe Hunt Begins
By Grande Chef Otto, VANCOUVER – VANCOUVER – With the arrival of the first bitter winter wind to this popular international tourist hotspot came also the first blasts and echoes of burpguns and mortars. No, Vancouver has not suddenly been […]
Posted in Canaduh, Grande Chef Otto, Highlighted Brutality
Tagged canada, canada's giraffe hunt begins, digg, giraffe hunt, Grande Chef Otto, Iraq, jeans, the brutal times
19 Comments
Daemon Mailer Tazed At Canadian Airport
By El Toro, TORONTO – Flamboyant Internet pioneer Daemon Mailer was rushed to Toronto’s Grace Hospital early this morning after being repeatedly tazed in front of shocked onlookers at Pearson International Airport. Mailer, who witnesses said appeared “between 30 and […]
Posted in Canaduh, Latest Brutality
Tagged bbfuncorp, canadian airport, cockblocker, daemon mailer, el toro, styles cradgerock, tazer, the bridle path, the brutal times
11 Comments